A year ago, I was terribly single. I hadn’t been on a date since high school and I was thinking I could easily go a decade without a date. So in January 2018, I put this ridiculous goal on my yearly goals list – I was going to go on a date by the end of August.
I went on a date the last weekend of August.
Talk about running right up to that deadline, right? Either way, since August, I’ve been on a few dates, been led on, been ghosted, ghosted someone (or two someones) and realized that even as I’m open to dating and being a relationship – I’m still a single, independent woman, and I probably always will be.
Either way, since it’s Valentine’s Day, I figured it would be fun to do a tribute to all the boys who made a significant impact on my dating life.
to all the boys I’ve “dated” in the past year….
to the first one who asked:
I’m sorry I never responded to your text after we left the coffee shop. You were nice, but that was it. I need more than nice, I need ambition and plans. Also, I’m just not attracted to gingers, as silly as that seems from a ginger to say, it’s true.
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to the two who were obsessed with my eight-year single streak and the idea of how someone survives that long without sex:
get over it, it’s possible. Your obsession is creepy and it made me really uncomfortable. I have no regrets about the time I have been single, as I’ve learned who I am as a person – not just a girlfriend or a daughter or a friend – I’ve learned who Laura is as herself. That’s worth being single (and sexless) for eight years. There is more to me than sex, and your inability to see that is why you never got an actual date. And why I ghosted one of y’all.
to the other guy I ghosted:
It was the holidays and I got busy and I just wasn’t that interested. Call me mean, but I used the holidays as a reason to just stop responding. Also the dating app doesn’t tell me half the time when I get messages. When you asked for my number at 2 AM over the holidays, and I really wasn’t all that interested, it seemed like a good time to just go on.
to the guy who couldn’t answer “what are you doing wednesday night?”
Thinking back about you still hurts, just a little. After two months of talking online, exchanging numbers, and both of us suggesting dates we should meet up, you couldn’t even answer “what are you doing Wednesday night?” when I tried once again to see if something could happen. At that point, you lost me and it’s a shame. Though the joke’s on you because apparently, my friend follows you on Instagram (I figured that one out two months after we stopped talking).
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to the guy who swiped right TWICE, and still couldn’t commit to a single date:
You swiped right on two dating apps and clearly thought I was cute. Yet, after time and time of me suggesting a possibility of us just getting coffee or drinks and getting shot down, I told you to name a time and a place, and you just became an Instagram stalker. After two and a half weeks of me constantly checking my Instagram and Snapchat stories to see if you’d seen them, I realized it was better that this never happened and I kicked you off of both. You still haven’t bothered to ask why and that pretty much sums up our history – you always said you were interested, but you never actually acted like it.
to the guy who is way out of my league:
All my friends, both straight and gay, have approved and suggested they’d sleep with you if I don’t. I like where this is going, but I’m a little hesitant because it seems so odd that you’re so interested. Only time will tell what’s going on with this, but for now, I really like it.
After six months of dating casually and never making it past a first date, I feel a lot better about Valentine’s Day than I did a year ago. Who knows, maybe next year, I’ll actually have someone to celebrate with. Either way, all of these boys are just a stepping stone to something worthwhile. After almost eight years without a date, I’m okay with taking my time on this and still hopeful that next year, I’ll be cuddled up with someone I love, not just the bottle of wine.